(This poem works best if you preface each line with the title)
Their postman is made of wood.
‘The Day of the Triffids’ advertises a sale at a garden centre.
Descartes describes carts not used at night.
That it would be dangerous for their postman to meet a fireman.
An ultimatum is the parent of an exceptional number of children.
Flies seen behind a shop window are available to purchase in store.
The Nobel Prize is awarded to retired campanologists.
Stamp duty refers to tax specific to philatelists.
Nuneaton houses the majority of bankrupt restaurateurs.
An off-licence needs replacing.
A guide dog prepares animal lovers for a real one.
In the pub, the cry of ‘Time at the bar now, please,’ alerts them to the availability of herbs on the premises.
A staple diet involves the drastic consumption of stationery.
Savoir-faire is a market.
Deluge means daytime tobogganing.
Psychosis has a psychopathic brother.
Collagen is a word for the top of a shirt soaked in alcoholic spirits.
Outrage describes the person who succeeds in being angrier than another, or the angriest in a group.
A fanatic is a storage area for fans in a loft.
Lofty ideals (eye deals) are opticians’ offers advertised in extremely high places, which are hard to see as a result.
Russian icons (eye cons) suggests ruthless Soviet swindlers who are robbing people blind.
Reptiles represent retailing outlets for household ceramics.
A pole vault is a Polish prison.
(TBC… Perhaps.)
Free association styled prose from Julian Cloran, visual artist, writer, poet and agent provocateur. Random musings, which are sometimes cynical, but always intended for amusement, stimulation and entertainment. Comments are welcomed so don't be shy. Simply click on 'comments' to post yours.
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