Wednesday 4 June 2008

MOSES WAS A MORON!

A burning bush—the Old Testament attests—spoke to Moses,
But I think he set fire to it being a furtive Smoker!
There’s no point beating around the bush,
Which, at a push, Moses found,
Oh, how he clowned,
(With) And frowned upon the Israelites.
God, he travelled slowly!
His mates said, ‘Keep taking the tablets, Moses.’
‘Thanks a bunch,’ he said to them,
When they handed him some roses.
But would a rose by any other name smell as sweet,
And, in a time where biblical tales and Shakespeare compete,
How could he know?
And what would it profit the ancient prophet,
If we could show the modern state of Israel to him?


Aaron’s rod was a gift from God,
A stick that changed into a snake,
When thrown on the floors of tyrants—
Before the hand of God would appear.
With a gimmick like a snake-stick,
Aaron needn’t have been his brother’s sidekick,
Capable, as he was,
Of such a neat despot dissipation trick,
Well, he must have been thick.
Not unlike the devout believers,
In accounts of these ancient guys,
And those who believe the Gospels are the gospel truth,

Fanatical members of gospel choirs raise the roof,
Singing to raise funds to repair their church roofs,
As burbling penitents, elsewhere,
Confide their sins in a booth,
Swearing blind their lies are truth,
Maintaining, also, that swearing is uncouth,
Their faith is so blind that they need no proof.

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