ROGER FEDERER’S FEET OF CLAY! ANDY MURRAY MAKES A MINT OUT OF FEDERER’S OPEN DOUBTS ABOUT THE FRENCH OPEN.

The world’s #1 tennis player, Roger Federer has always struggled to make an impression playing on clay courts. A surface on which rival, and world ranked #2; Rafael Nadal exhibits supremacy with seeming ease. Meanwhile, without having distinguished himself on grass, clay or hard courts particularly, Britain’s top player, Andy Murray has capitalised on his two back-to-back victories over a recently vulnerable appearing Federer; attracting speculative articles across the sports pages about his future potential. Said articles are reminiscent of the misguided optimism that used to exaggerate former top Brit, Tim Henman’s abilities and chances of winning Wimbledon. Murray, a Scot mysteriously referred to as a Brit, has only recently stopped being sick when forced to play five sets and—like hapless Henman before him—has only one realistic chance of winning Wimbledon, and that is if it’s raffled off.