ELVIS HELPS THE HOMELESS!

Elvis Presley, back from the dead, buys a copy of the Big Issue.
Finding the pages are torn and defaced, he does an about turn singing:
‘Return to Vendor’…
When the King seizes hold of him, the Big Issue seller sneezes,
So, mirthfully, Elvis offers him a, ‘Big tissue, big tissue.’
‘Say, fella,’ Elvis asks him. ‘Do ya roam less when you’re homeless?’
His cruel wit scored a direct hit,
When he sang ‘Whole Lotta Shakin’,’ to an epileptic.
Later, he staged a concert at Beachy Head called ‘The Quiff on the Cliff.’
He’d toyed with the idea of bleaching his hair and becoming ‘Bleachy’ Head,
But, to the relief of his fans, retained his familiar image instead.